“Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson
How do you know when you should quit your job and change your life?
Do you wake up every day miserable and wanting a new life? Do you come home exhausted and have little energy for anything you actually enjoy doing? Do you wish you could snap your fingers and suddenly everything would be different? If so, I understand. I was there myself.
It had been four long years since I’d had a vacation. I felt like a slave. Every day was the same thing. Get up, work-out, go to work, come home and do homework or go to happy hour and a hike on Sunday. It was like Groundhog Day over and over and over year after year after year.
My soul was slowly dying and I felt it.
For two of the four years I was an independent contractor and although they paid me well I couldn’t afford to take time off because I would lose too much money so I worked every day, eight hours a day except major holidays. I came to realize I could not sustain that pace forever and knew I had to change my life, but how and to what?
I guess fate stepped in and brought me a catalyst in the form of a man. For some reason, my break-up with him sent me into a soul-searching frenzy.
I told myself never again. Never again would I be in a relationship with an emotionally barren man. I knew it was the time and the place to change not only my relationships but my entire life.
The time had come and I could either keep doing the same thing or make some changes. I was at a point where I felt there was no option. I could only move forward.
I started to focus on myself and what makes me tick. I started to write again. I started meditating. I started to think about what I wanted out of life and what makes me happy as an individual and then set out on a course to attain it.
Every day I would get up and work out and work but instead of going to happy hour or watching TV after work I had a purpose. I would write and write and write. I read books. I watched podcasts. I would meditate as much as four times per day. I consciously focused on minimizing my anxiety and maximizing my self-worth. I made a plan to start saving as much as I could.
Over time I began to feel a certain calmness that I had never felt before. I had always known that telling my story of abuse would somehow be my way out and my way forward. When I was a child I used to write a lot. I would write stories and journal and was quite creative. Then I went to law school which stripped away any creative part of me, but did teach me to write with purpose.
I decided to start a blog (thanks for reading!). I decided to put my story out to the world. I felt a little freer. I was inspiring and helping others and for the first time I found a sense of meaning. I had found my new path or it had found me.
Every day I wrote and over the course of four months I had about twenty-five blog posts written. Luckily my sister is a web site designer (otherwise I would have been completely stuck) so I was able to launch my blog for about $50.
Still, I kept working. I kept sludging away. I kept telling myself, “I can’t do this much longer”. In December 2016 my contract was renewed so I figured I was safe. However, the Universe had been listening to my thoughts and one week later I was told my contract was being cancelled due to federal budget cuts. The time had come, or had it?
I was still stressed about starting out on my own without any unemployment and I wasn’t sure I was totally ready so I took a temp job. To go from working at home to commuting a half hour and working in an office environment doing a job I hated even more than the last was even more miserable. Many days I cried on the way to work or on the way home.
I was scared. I had never been an entrepreneur. I had always worked for someone else. I didn’t know if I could do it on my own. At the same time I knew I could no longer keep doing a job that brought me no satisfaction and no longer could I keep working for closed minded corporations that want you to fit into a tiny little box.
I would try to be okay with going to work telling myself, “You can do this” and “it’s only for a few months”, but again I knew I was lying to myself. I was beyond unhappy. The Universe again answered me by ending my temp assignment.
I was free!
I was still scared beyond belief, but this time I knew there was no going back. No longer could I fool myself into believing I could live an inauthentic life. No longer could I work for someone else. No longer could I feel like a slave for some company who really didn’t care about me or my life.
I was in control!
The first thing I did was get on a plane, take a vacation and go visit my boyfriend. For two weeks I slept, laid by the pool, ate and drank. It was heaven. Doing nothing meant everything. After four years of sleep deprivation I found myself sleeping through the night and basking in the joy of doing nothing. Sometimes the littlest things can mean the biggest things.
Today I have a plan to create my life instead of letting my life happen to me. I get up every day and put in 7-8 hours of work but the work I do is for me and not some faceless corporation. I train, I write, I read, I research. I have a plan in place to work for myself and help others at the same time. I’m in no rush and I have faith it will all work out.
I didn’t always feel that way, but at some point you have to crawl before you can walk and walk before you can run and I’m crawling and that’s okay.
So, when you wake up every morning and you despise your life or your job what do you think you can do to make it different? Not everyone should work for themselves and not everyone will follow the same path I did, nor should you.
Maybe it’s time for you to do a little soul searching and find out what motivates you as a human being. Maybe you want to go back to school, become a teacher, a nurse or write a book. Maybe you want to join the military, make jewelry or travel the world.
Take some time out of your day and sit down and write out what you want to change in your life. Maybe you are happy with your job, but not your health, or relationships, or financial situation or personal development.
Maybe you want to change one thing and maybe you want to change everything. Start with one thing and start writing out little goals. Make a weekly calendar. Stop letting life just happen to you. Create the life that you want and that you deserve.